Mourning a Website

Mourning a Website

I am impulsive.  Sometimes I move too fast without realizing the consequences.  Sometimes it works out fine.  Sometimes I look back with regret, but of course, I can’t undo what has been done. 

Technology keeps moving so when I got the word a few months back that the website for my business , Ackley & Ross Funeral Home, would soon lose its support and that I had the opportunity to move to a much more upto date format that would cost less and bring the business higher in Google search-whatever that means-I figured I had to go with it.  It didn’t really matter that I liked the look of the website that I had.  When it was built, a lot of thought was put into its creation to capture the look and feel of softness and the care and concern that we are about.  But it was “old fashioned” and the Eternal Tributes were expensive and the consumer couldn’t order flowers at one in the morning, etc, etc., so I needed to move on.  The new company did work hard with me, creating a special header, helping me understand how things can be changed within, calming the fears of the “teck nerd” that I am.  This was all done at a relatively fast pace.

Then last Friday the new website was LAUNCHED and my old website DISAPEARED into cyberspace and I was not ready!  I had not thought of making a copy of the content, most of which I had written myself. I wasn’t prepared for this new “canned” look and what it said about me. (I will have the opportunity to make it more personal but of course that will take lots of tech help.)  I had not said goodbye.

I work with more and more families who choose cremation as the final disposition for their loved one.  Many of those are what we call DIRECT CREMATION which means there is no viewing of the body after removal from the place of death.  The final goodbye is said at the scene and their loved one is taken away to be returned later as ashes in a container.

I believe that there is peace in death. Through my years of caring for the dead I have seen that peace.  I have also seen the comfort that seeing a loved one at peace brings to a family.  I have seen the comfort in having the chance to say a final goodbye to the body of a loved one. 

Since the beginning of time there have been rituals for death.  They help the living accept the reality and finality of death.  They offer the living the support of family, friends and community. They help us all embrace the wonder of life and death and remind us to live with love and joy.

I cannot tell families what to do.  What I can do is urge them-and you the reader-to slow down when it comes to the death of a loved one, to take the time to say goodbye. 

My old website is gone.  The new one will be fine with some tweaking.  But it still makes me sad.



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2 Responses to Mourning a Website

  1. Melissa says:

    Elizabeth, you’re writing just gets better and better. You have such a poignancy to your words, which I find very captivating to read. I am interested in seeing how you develop this further–your understanding or your calling as a Funeral Director, and where you find yourself in the next weeks and months.

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